Here's the thing. You are always going to be you. So what I don't understand is why people feel the need to tell me to act different than the way I am in order to attract other people. This pertains to both platonic and romantic relationships. "Act like the kind of person you want to be to attract those sorts of people" they tell me. Which makes sense if you don't think about it. But what's to say that the people you're trying to attract aren't doing the exact same thing? They could be as big of a phony as you're being at yet there you may sit wishing you could be more like them. Why on earth would I want that? What is so wrong with being raw and honest and truthful about who you are? I am a sinner saved by grace. What I don't want is people who make the same mistakes I've made tell me maybe ill do better next time. I want someone who is going to sit with me in the muck and say this sucks and I'm right here with you - but how thankful Re we that we have a savior that loves us despite our shortcomings and encourages us to show others his infinite love. THAT'S the sort of person I want to be. And that's the sort of person I want to be around. Not the person who sweeps truth under the rug. So you go farther with a member of the opposite sex than you wanted to. I'm not saying proclaim it to the world but don't lie about it. I'll say it before and I'll say it again - I am a sinner saved by grace that is bound to wander but my loving savior continues to pursue me. It's okay that you're not perfect. Nobody is. Our saviors strength is made known in our weakness. Be honest with people. You may be surprised to find out that they're just as messed up as you are.