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it is so difficult trying to get across how i want people to react to me. on the one hand i want most people to just leave me alone. i get more pitying looks in a day than i think people should get in a lifetime. i'm fully aware of my circumstances. i don't need your looks and wrist grabs to remind me when i've finally blocked it from my mind. on the other hand, i want a very select few to shake me till i fall to my knees weeping because it's too much to hold onto. and yet another people i want to understand is that it kills me daily to not be with my family at this point in my life. put yourself in my shoes. would you transfer closer to home to get the same degree but yet be closer to your family? stop asking why i want to transfer and telling me that you would die without me here. it's a difficult enough decision in itself without incorporating the opinions of everyone around me.